Sunday, May 23, 2010


I didn't really want to write this post but I can't get it out of my head. So here goes:

I want to talk about sadness. It amazes (and saddens) me how many of my animal friends who seem so full of sunshine, who make me smile when I need it most, struggle with deep, dark, long sadness. Sometimes they tweet something so you know what they're going through. Sometimes they just disappear for a few days or a few months and all you can do is send a message, hope they respond, hope they're alright.

This is hard for us because we like to help-I think most anipals fit in that category. But this kind of sadness is a slippery, tricksy thing because while I think we all can relate to it, it remains unique to every person who goes through it. Meaning that the only person who can fix it, is the one whom it's affecting. Those on the outside are more or less helpless. All we can do is care, offer to lend an ear or a shoulder, and pray.

I think so many anipals experience this sadness because anipals tend to be a very open, sensitive group. I believe we gravitate toward the anipal community because it feels very safe and loving. However, once in a while there is drama or a misunderstanding or an intentional fight. It's hard for me to see this (well, it's hard for me to see, period, but you know what I mean) because it doesn't accomplish anything. Sure, there are times when I disagree with someone or heck, even know for a fact they are just plain wrong. But if I find myself about to tweet a response, I usually erase it. I'm not a milquetoast by any means, but what does it accomplish asides from hurt feelings? Is it worth ruining someone's day to prove a point? So unless it's a very big deal and/or is directed at me, I usually just keep my paws quiet.

By all means, if something is important to you, speak up. But please keep in mind that we don't always know what the other person is going through and so we can't know the impact our words might have.


  1. Very wise post my friend. You are right - we don't always know what the other person is going through or how they are feeling. There has been a time or two where I put my paw in my mouth too and regretted what I had said or the manner in which I said it. Sometimes it's hard to get the point across in 140 letters. Your post is a good reminder to be more careful.

  2. Well said Maximus! I think the anipal community can be very important for many of us who only have our humans to talk to, there sure aren't too many places for a teddy bear or a dog to meet like minded individuals. I am personally very grateful for the unconditional love and support I have received from my tweeps, life would be much less fun without them!

  3. I'm like Mario sometimes putting my paw in my mouth. I think it's normal to agree or disagree as long as you treat everyone with love and respect. Opinions don't have to be personal. Sorry you're feeling sad SeattleP

  4. I agree dear pal! You may be blinds but you see oh so well! Purrs
    (Signed: Smokey8 fr Twitter)

  5. Sometimes even an unintentional comment can cause hurt, simply because we don't know what scars others hide. So what can we do? Walk on eggshelss around others or just try and make reasonable comments? I think the latter is the best policy, a UK department store has the motto 'never knowingly undersold', maybe our motto should be 'never knowingly hurtful' .. not a bad way to be..

  6. These are very wise words. My mummy is a bit worried at the moment about one of her friends who makes her smile who has "gone quiet". He's not answering her mails and tweets and she knows he's been having a hard time lately.

    Here's a big DRAGONHUG for everyone out there who needs one! Pass it on after you've used it, please.

  7. To Woo - I agree. Twitter is (or should be?) a fun, silly place and I'd hate for it to become boring because we were so afraid of saying the wrong thing we never say anything at all. So "never knowingly hurtful" might be a good motto. I originally intended this post to be supportive of the Sad Ones and kind of ended up going off on a tangent at the end. :(

  8. I agree with what everyone said. We should be able to express ourselves, but we should be kind and respectful. "Never knowingly hurtful" works for me! Also, that goes along with the "golden rule" stated by Jesus in the Bible, at Matthew 7:12
    I am sorry to all who are having a hard time, right now.

  9. Very wise, my dear friend. We should try to be objective in front of an opinion that we don't like, so we don't make things worst. And even if we aren't feeling well we should not take things against others. We all are therapy anipals to our humans, well, we should do that to our anipals in our beautiful online community. Great post. Take care!

  10. That is such an insightful blog entry. I have noticed anipals being very unhappy as well and I hurts me to think of them but I do believe that most of them will get through it and come out the otherside. I always want to support them but sometimes you have to support them by leaving them alone and I find that very hard to do. HUGS to you Maximus for saying what lots of us have been thinking about.

  11. Thankyou for that, I think you are very wise. I hope we can be friends. xx Major

  12. If it wasn't for the anipal community, I wouldn't have a forever-and-ever home now, and Mom wouldn't have me to cheer her up. And if it wasn't for YOU, Maximus, we wouldn't have a very dear friend and his Girl. Thanks for the thoughtful words here...and thanks for helping Mom and I through all of the sadness we've had lately. *hugs*

  13. yes I have seen arguments on twitter which to me seem very silly. but to those in the argument it was obviously something very important at the moment. :((
    My momma always has a huge heart and shoulder to listen to anyone, to give support, or an opinion.
    She, too, has lost a friend (been blocked) because of something she felt was very silly.
    A lost friend is something she hurts over alot.
    Lets all try to remember twitter is a fun silly place, lets keep it that way...

  14. Dear Maximus,
    very glad to meet you here.
    we think this is a very nicely written post.
    we agree with you totally about the solidarity in the anipal community.
    guess anipals donot hesitate to be friends because they are a happier, unassuming, uncomplicated lot.
    infact blogging here is one of the most satisfying things in our and our Mummy's lives
    hope we can be friends,
    wags, Buddy and Ginger

  15. Great post Maximus - I guess the most we can do for sad pals is to be here when they need us.

  16. U my blind widdle fwiend, see eberything! U R a wise, wonderful and fun fwiend - I just lub U! & U goil, she's a doll :)

    Nice post - thank U for UR thoughtfulness!